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For the ‘bored’ partner . . . ask your partner to let you plan an evening of entertainment. Arrive home from work early that day (before your partner gets home) and prepare a sexual meal. This may consist of linguine with clams, grapes, wine and cheese… (it all depends on your food tastes… and don’t forget, if you can’t cook, you can always order food and have it delivered). When your partner gets home, you will answer the door in a butler or maid’s outfit. The maid should be wearing just an apron, and the butler should be wearing just a tie. The only lights in the house should be some dimly lit candles. The table should be set with the fancy tablecloth, fine china and a bottle of champagne. You may want to have some snacks prepared in case your partner is hungry when she/he gets home. Upon your partner’s arrival, invite her/him to take a bath. After undressing your partner, you should help her/him into the bath tub, where you will proceed to wash her/him. Not only should you wash their hair, which entails a scalp massage, but pay special attention to the genital area. After your partner is relaxed from the wash, serve your partner dinner. During dinner, pay special attention to whatever your partner wants to talk about. Let yourself be inquisitive to learn more about whatever your partner has to say. What is the meaning behind her/his words? After dinner, lead her/him to the bedroom and begin giving a head-to-toe massage. Let your hands wander.

For more tips written by this author please click here.

The Recycled Virgin
Both you and your partner take turns pretending like you are virgins.  You take one night of the week and they can take the next one.  Have your partner walk you through it and calm your “imaginary” fears by giving you step-by-step instructions.  You can act shy and timid and keep pushing them away when they get to certain “bases” and it can be interesting to see how long you can pretend not to know a damn thing.  I mean how many “experienced” people can just lie there when they are getting fucked royally?
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Under No Circumstances
You gotta love this one and it is a game of mind over matter.  It also requires a hell of a lot of willpower.  Without tying your partners hands or confining them in any way, tell them that they can not touch you no matter what you do to them.  That means you mean can’t touch a woman if she does a lap dance or even if she sucks your dick.  Same goes for the women.  No touching whatsoever or you will have to pay the penalty.  My suggested penalty is that you must perform oral sex on your mate for twelve hours straight if you fuck up.
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Xtra Naked
Cover the bed or floor with an old blanket or something you don’t mind messing up and then get naked. Cover each other with baby oil from head to toe so that you are both very slippery and then fuck.  It will be hard to even hold on to each other and private parts will be slipping and sliding everywhere but it is mad funny.
Tips by Zane.

1. In the company of feminists, coitus should be referred to as:
a) Lovemaking
b) Screwing
c) The pigskin bus pulling into tuna town
           
2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you’ve both shared:
a) Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship
b) Your blood-test results
c) Five tequila slammers
           
3. You time your orgasm so that:
a) Your partner climaxes first
b) You both climax simultaneously
c) You don’t miss Sports Center (Sky)

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
a) Healthy, creative love-play
b) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would ever agree to
c) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about
           
5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you’ve just had sex with is:
a) The best part of the experience
b) The second best part of the experience
c) $100 extra
           
6. Your girlfriend says she’s gained five pounds in weight in the last month. You tell her that it is:
a) Not a concern of yours
b) Not a problem - she can join your gym
c) A conservative estimate
           
7. You think today’s sensitive, caring man is:
a) A myth
b) An oxymoron
c) A moron
           
8. Foreplay is to sex as:
a) Appetizer is to entree
b) Priming is to painting
c) A queue is to an amusement park ride
           
9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
a) “I hope we can still be friends.”
b) “I’m not in right now. Please leave a message after the tone….”
c) “Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.”
           
10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
a) Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy
b) Is uptight and a waste of time
c) Shouldn’t have sat next to you on the bus in the first place

If you answered ‘A’ more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really are a man.
If you answered ‘B’ more than 7 times, check into therapy, you’re still a little confused.
If you answered ‘C’ more than 7 times, call me up. Let’s go drinking.

Don’t cheat! Before you read on, choose your favorite marshmallow bit from Lucky Charms cereal from the list below:
Pink hearts
Yellow moons
Orange stars
Green clovers
Blue diamonds
Purple horseshoes
Those icky oat bits
Okay. Have you got one in mind? Now you can read on. And don’t change it!

An amazing new study shows that your favorite Lucky Charms
marshmallow bit shape determines what you’re like in bed!

Yes, it’s true–just take this simple test to determine your true
bedroom personality:

GREEN CLOVERS: If your favorite Lucky Charms marshmallow shape is the green clover, you’re a happy-go-lucky type in bed. You don’t take anything too seriously in the bedroom or elsewhere and always manage to have a good time, even if you have someone else with you. You don’t have any patience with depressed people and tend to sit on them until they cheer up.
BLUE DIAMONDS: If your favorite marshmallow shape is the blue diamond, your thoughts in bed are mostly about what you’ll get later. “If he really enjoys this, will he buy me that mink coat?” is probably what’s going through your mind. People who like blue diamonds have a notebook of preprinted fill-in-the-blank palimony suit forms and are the people most likely to file their nails while making love.
ORANGE STARS: If your favorite shape is the orange star, you
expect to be the center of attention in bed. You expect your partner to spend most of his time pleasing you and when you do something for him, you expect enthusiastic moaning if not applause. People who like orange stars often have mirrors over their beds, not because they are turned on by watching what is being done, but because they want to be able to watch themselves having a good time. They often moan out their own names while
making love.
PINK HEARTS: If you like pink hearts, you’re the romantic type. You like your partner to whisper romantic phrases into your ear and, if he’s too distracted to form coherent phrases, you’ll settle for romantic syllables. People who like pink hearts read most of the romance novels published and are turned on by people wearing armor.
PURPLE HORSESHOES: If purple horseshoes are your thing, your tastes are modern, uninhibited, and somewhat warped. You like variety in the bedroom, especially when you can include handcuffs, chains, swingsets, and chocolate pudding. Be careful when going out on a picnic with anyone who likes purple horseshoes–she’s/ he’s likely to pin you down with croquet hoops when you’re not looking and who knows what could happen next?
YELLOW MOONS: If you’re the yellow moon type, you’re more interested in satisfying your partner’s needs than your own. You prefer to lie back and wait for your partner to jump on you and express her/his needs verbally or nonverbally. People who like yellow moons usually own several pairs of handcuffs and other instruments of kinky sex just in case someone should ever want to tie them up and ravish them. Keep your eyes open for anyone who eats all the yellow moons out of her cereal as soon as she opens
the box.
OAT BITS:  Those little oat bits that aren’t marshmallows at all: If you prefer the little oat bits, you probably don’t like sex anyway and don’t need to read this article.  People who prefer the oat bits usually become accountants, librarians who work at the reference desk, or government employees; these people like to chow down on a big bowl brimming with oat bits before a tough day of protesting suggestive lyrics in rock music. People who like oat bits have more time to spend writing letters to the editor than any other type.

By Patrick Carnes, Ph.D. and Robert Weiss, LCSW

Answer each question yes or no. Depending on the particular pattern of symptoms:
1- 3 “yes” responses may indicate an area of concern and should be openly discussed with a friend or family member.
4 - 6 positive answers would indicate a possible problem with sexual addiction, leading to consideration of a 12-Step support program such as Sex Addicts Anonymous, Sexual Compulsives Anonymous, Sexaholics Anonymous, Sexual Recovery Anonymous, or Sex & Love Addicts Anonymous (click 12-STEP INFO button).
6 or more “yes” responses clearly describe a problem with potentially self abusive and/or dangerous consequences. Should seriously consider treatment with a counselor trained in the area of sexual addiction.
————————————————————————
Were you sexually abused as a child or adolescent?
 
Have you subscribed or regularly purchased/rented sexually explicit magazines or videos?
 
Did your parents have trouble with their sexual or romantic behaviors?
 
Do you often find yourself preoccupied with sexual thoughts?
 
Has your use of phone sex lines, computer sex lines etc. exceeded your ability to pay for these services?
 
Does your significant other(s), friends, or family ever worry or complain about your sexual behavior? (not related to sexual orientation)
 
Do you have trouble stopping your sexual behavior when you know it is inappropriate and/or dangerous to your health?
 
Has your involvement with pornography, phone sex, computer board sex, etc. become greater than your intimate contacts with romantic partners?
 
Do you keep the extent or nature of your sexual activities hidden from your friends and/or partners? (not related to sexual orientation)
 
Do you look forward to events with friends or family being over so that you can go out to have sex?
 
Do you visit sexual bathhouses, sex clubs and/or video bookstores as a regular part of your sexual activity?
 
Do you believe that anonymous or casual sex has kept you from having more long-term intimate relationships or from reaching other personal goals?
 
Do you have trouble maintaining intimate relationships once the “sexual newness” of the person has worn off?
 
Do your sexual encounters place you in danger of arrest for lewd conduct or public indecency?
 
Have you spent time worrying about being HIV positive, and continue to engage in risky or unsafe sexual behavior anyway?
 
Has anyone ever been hurt emotionally by events related to your sexual behavior, e.g. lying to partner or friends, not showing up for event/appointment due to sexual liaisons, etc., (not related to sexual orientation)?
 
Have you ever been approached, charged, arrested by the police, security, etc. due to sexual activity in a public place?
 
Has sex been a way for you to escape your problems?
 
When you have sex, do you feel depressed afterwards?
 
Have you made repeated promises to yourself to change some form of your sexual activity only to break them later? (not related to sexual orientation)
 
Have your sexual activities interfered with some aspect of your professional or personal life, e.g. unable to perform at work, loss of relationship? (not related to sexual orientation)
 
Have you engaged in unsafe or “risky” sexual practices even though you knew it could cause you harm?
 
Have you ever paid for sex?
 
Have you ever had sex with someone just because you were feeling aroused and later felt ashamed or regretted it?
 
Have you ever cruised public restrooms, rest areas and/or parks looking for sexual encounters with strangers?

For more than 20 years there has been an ongoing dialogue between the Greek Ministry of Education and other interested parties — schools, parent associations — on the introduction of sexual education into the Greek high school curriculum. But there is still no final decision on sexual education.
Recently the debate about sexual education in high schools in Greece has focused on whether there should be a separate course or whether sex education should be part of a broader curriculum on health education and health behavior. This is the latest stage in an issue which remains unresolved despite long-running discussions and results from several studies.
The appearance of HIV/ AIDS has led to a reconsideration of young people’s sexuality and their awareness of protective measures. Young people, and especially high-school students who start their sexual activity at the age of 15 and 16, are at risk of being infected by HIV as they are not well informed . Their knowledge is often limited to peer information because there is no sexual education in schools at present and any health education courses avoid topics on sexuality. Thus young people usually begin their sexual life without adequate information on sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), HIV prevention and contraception.
Many parents, although concerned about the sexual behavior of their children, appear to be hesitant about the introduction of sexual education in schools. Nevertheless, a Parents’ Association in the Athens region wrote a letter addressed to the Ministries of Education and Health, the Greek Family Planning Association, the teachers’ associations of elementary and secondary education, and to SEXTANT, expressing serious concern about the lack of official information being given to their children. They took this initiative after participating in a seminar organized by the Greek FPA, where they had had the chance to hear about the consequences of lack of information on sexual matters. At this time, SEXTANT applied for and received funding from the Ministry of Health’s Centre for Control of Infectious Diseases for a pilot survey in the area of Athens on parental attitudes towards the sexual education of their children.
Parents have distinctive attitudes towards the inclusion or not of sexual education in the school curriculum. Some parents support the idea and consider it extremely important because of the threat of HIV infection. On the other hand, other parents are completely against the idea, their main argument being that such lessons will ‘push’ their children to start their sexual activity much younger than would have ‘normally’ been the case. These extremely opposite attitudes coexist and make it difficult for decision makers to take any steps since they do not wish to cause serious problems to any number of parents.

Research aims and methodology
The research project focuses on five aspects of sexual education:
current attitudes of parents towards informing children about sexual behavior topics that parents do not want to be included in sexual education classes
attitudes concerning the ‘proper’ age that parents believe their children should learn about sexual behavior possible differences in attitudes of parents relating to the gender of the child and what they feel male and female children should learn ideas about the most ‘adequate’ person/ institution to be responsible for provision of sexual education to young people.
Limited financial resources did not allow for national research in a representative sample. Thus the decision was made to carry out a pilot survey in the Athens region, the results of which could be interpreted as only indicative not conclusive. A questionnaire was used containing open and closed questions.
In all, 140 questionnaires were completed by parents in three areas of Athens covering the centre, which includes a mixed population in socio-economic terms, working class areas and provinces with a more upper-middle-class population. The sample was drawn randomly from Parents’ Association lists in the relevant areas. Then the researchers called up parents to inform them about the research and where parents were willing to take part interviewers visited them at home or in the workplace. The parent completed the questionnaire on his or her own. However, in many cases parents preferred the interviewer to read the questions out and record responses.
The only refusals were related to lack of time available and not to the research themes. Interviewers asked for either parent to complete the questionnaire but in the majority of cases the father suggested that the mother was the more appropriate person to answer such a questionnaire. Thus the sample has an over-representation of mothers. After the completion of the questionnaires the open questions were coded and the gathered data analyzed using multiple correspondence analysis as well as cluster analysis.

Demographic characteristics
As mentioned above, most respondents (72 per cent) were women, 21.4 per cent lived in working class areas, 55.7 per cent in the centre of Athens and 22.9 per cent in the northern provinces. Most respondents belonged to the age group 41– 50 and the mean age of respondents’ first child was 16. More than half (51.4 per cent) of the parents had completed secondary education and 34.3 per cent were university graduates. Most parents were either civil servants or freelance professional, and 17.9 per cent of the women were housewives.
Researchers included a question on where respondents had lived most of their lives, in Athens or in the countryside. The aim of this question was to investigate whether parents who had lived most of their lives in urban areas expressed more progressive ideas than those who came from rural areas. Some 62.9 per cent of the parents had lived most of their lives in the countryside, which is not surprising because the majority of citizens in Athens do originally come from the countryside.
A question about the religious beliefs of the parents was also included since it may affect people’s attitudes towards sex and sexuality. In this sample, most of the parents (64.3 per cent) considered themselves a little religious while 26.4 per cent considered themselves very religious.
Most (66.4 per cent) indicated that they were not members of any clubs or associations — the aim of this question being to identify differences in attitudes between socially active parents and those who are less active in the community. (In this study no noticeable differences were established.)
Parents were also asked how often they read newspapers or magazines, with a response of 50.7 per cent indicating that they read a newspaper every day. In the multiple correspondence analysis there were differences between parents who were often informed through the mass media and those who were not. The former express more progressive attitudes in relation to the education of their children in sexual issues.

Health, sexuality, AIDS and other STDs
The majority of parents declared that their primary sources of information on health issues were television (64.3 per cent) and specialized scientists (53.6 per cent). In general, respondents believed that they had enough information on AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases (66.4 per cent). This question was aiming to establish parents’ personal evaluation of their knowledge on important issues that their children might need to informed about by them. Only 19.3 per cent of the parents believed that they were very well informed on such issues.
Almost all parents (99.3 per cent) believed that their children should be informed about these issues and 49.3 per cent considered that the best time for such education to be the first three years of high school when students are between 12 and 15 years old. A substantial minority of parents (40.7 per cent) believed that the best time that a child should gain some information on these topics was elementary school ( 6 to 12 year olds). It is noticeable here that parents are split into two groups: those who realize that the earlier someone is informed on these issues the more protected he or she is in the future, and those who believe that their child should get information when he/ she is almost ready to start sexual activity.
As many as 76.4 per cent of parents reported that they were the most appropriate people to inform their children on these issues and only 7.9 per cent mentioned teachers as the right people to give such information. This opinion is related to the fact that 91.4 per cent of parents believe that they are able to discuss issues relating to sexuality with their children. According to these parents, the subjects that their children should be informed on are: methods of family planning (28.6 per cent), AIDS (20 per cent), and relationships and love (19.3 per cent). Another 19.3 per cent consider other subjects more important, subject such as drugs, health problems, condoms as protection from sexually transmitted diseases, etc.
When the parents were asked if they had ever bought a book on sex education for their children, 45.7 per cent said ‘no’ and 40 per cent said that there was no information on AIDS and other STDs in their homes.
Almost all of the parents (98.6 per cent) agreed that sex education should be included in the school curriculum, and it is encouraging that 41.4 per cent of the parents reported that sex education should begin in elementary school. Amongst the subjects that should be included in these lessons, the parents mentioned AIDS and other STDs, family planning and condom use. As for the most appropriate person to teach these subjects, parents believed that a health specialist (40.7 per cent) or a doctor (37.1 per cent) are the best.
Another indicative answer of the parents’ concerns over sex education courses in schools emerged in their belief that health education should include sex education topics and thus there should not necessarily be a separate course concentrating mostly on sexuality. Here it is either fear that a sex education course will lead to early sexual experimentation or that school is not the best place for their children to be informed about sexual matters, but only on health issues.
A considerable number of parents (57.1 per cent) are confident that their child can be protected against AIDS and other STDs and only 13.6 per cent said that they did not know or they were not certain if their child had adequate information in order to protect themselves.
Another subject was one the mass media coverage of health issues. If children do not get information at school, can they at least learn something through the mass media. Many parents (80 per cent) believed that today in Greece the mass media do not adequately cover health issues and suggested that there should be more TV programs about health and related matters.

Parent and child relations
Parents were asked if they discussed issues related to sexual behavior with their sons and their daughters respectively. The questions were asked separately for boys and girls to identify possible differences in subjects parents prefer to discuss or avoid in relation to the gender of their child. From their answers, it is evident that with their sons parents talk often about AIDS and other STDs, condom use and gender relations, while they avoid topics such as masturbation, abortion and orgasm. While parents appear to discuss the same issues with their daughters, they avoid discussing homosexuality. It also appears that abortion is still considered a woman’s issue as parents spend more time talking to their girls about contraception and abortion (53 per cent for both issues with daughters, while for sons these percentages are 44.3 per cent and 25.3 per cent, respectively).

Communication within the family
The mother is usually the one who undertakes to discuss with her children topics concerning sexuality (68.6 per cent) and in some cases (21.4 per cent) both parents do. Subjects that parents do not feel comfortable discussing with their children are masturbation and homosexuality. These subjects are relevant for both genders so parents do not appear to make any distinction between boys and girls.
Two-thirds of the parents declared that they were aware of the fact that their child (12– 18 years of age) had already begun his or her sexual activity. Most of the parents found out this information from their own child, while 14.3 per cent said they had found out in different ways, such as through the child’s friends, their child’s behavior, or just from instinct.

Talking about sex
A significant number of parents claimed that they were aware of the fact that their child was using a contraceptive method (54.4 per cent). This might be related to the parents’ belief that their child trusts them (54.3 per cent) and talks to them about his/ her relationships with the opposite sex. Parents appear to have frequent discussions with their children on these topics and 35.7 per cent of the parents had positive feelings about talking to their children about sexuality. However, 24.3 per cent of parents did admit that they felt uncomfortable and described different negative feelings such as stress, fear, shame, and so on.

Conclusions
The results of this pilot survey are not more than tentative. Taking these limitations into account, the following observations are most striking. Mass media is the main source of information in health issues with TV being the primary source. Most of the parents think that they are well informed about AIDS and STDs and they gain this information mainly from doctors and seminars. Many parents do not consider teachers the most appropriate people to inform their children and to undertake sexual education in schools.
Almost all parents believe that they are able to discuss sexuality with their children. This is in contrast to children who say that they seldom talk to their parents about these subjects (Greek Institute of Sexology, 1997. Agrafiotis et al, 1991.) It is also important to take into consideration that many parents have never bought a book or any other material on sexuality for their children.
Parents believe that the subjects are important for the children and that they should be informed about contraceptive methods, AIDS and sexual relations.
Parents are persuaded that sex education should be included in the school curriculum. However, they do not think that it should be taught as an independent subject but should be integrated in health education. And most felt that is should start in high school.
It is evident that mothers have the task to inform their children about sexuality and they select the issues they discuss with them. Subjects that some consider important for adolescents such as masturbation or orgasm are avoided by parents. It is well known though that ignorance and wrong information in these issues could lead to sexual problems in adult life.
Most of the parents find out from their own child if he/ she has started sexual activity. This is also reinforced by the fact that the majority of parents believe that children trust them and discuss with them their relations with the other sex.
The more informed parents are on health and sexual issues, the more progressive are their attitudes towards informing their children.
In research that was carried out among parents, teachers and adolescents in Greece in relation to sex education (Kakavoulis A., 1995) it appeared that both parents and school are not adequate in providing the proper sex education to young children. Young people feel that they do not have the satisfactory information they should have on these issues. They also believe that sex education should begin very early and not in high school. Most importantly, parents appear to be ready to accept sex education to be included in the school curriculum. This may result from the threat of AIDS and the threat it poses to young people.

Dr Elizabeth Ioannidi-Kapolou

Should sex education be taught in schools?
The question is no longer should sex education be taught, but rather how should it be taught. Over 93% of all public high schools currently offer courses on sexuality or HIV. More than 510 junior or senior high schools have school-linked health clinics, and more than 300 schools make condoms available on campus. The question now is are these programs effective, and if not, how can we make them better?

Why do youth need sex education?
Kids need the right information to help protect themselves. The US has more than double the teenage pregnancy rate of any western industrialized country, with more than a million teenagers becoming pregnant each year. Teenagers have the highest rates of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) of any age group, with one in four young people contracting an STD by the age of 21. STDs, including HIV, can damage teenagers’ health and reproductive ability. And there is still no cure for AIDS.
HIV infection is increasing most rapidly among young people. One in four new infections in the US occurs in people younger than 22. In 1994, 417 new AIDS cases were diagnosed among 13-19 year olds, and 2,684 new cases among 20-24 year olds. Since infection may occur up to 10 years before an AIDS diagnosis, most of those people were infected with HIV either as adolescents or pre-adolescents.

Why has sex education failed to help our children?
Knowledge alone is not enough to change behaviors. Programs that rely mainly on conveying information about sex or moral precepts-how the body’s sexual system functions, what teens should and shouldn’t do-have failed. However, programs that focus on helping teenagers to change their behavior-using role playing, games, and exercises that strengthen social skills-have shown signs of success.
In the US, controversy over what message should be given to children has hampered sex education programs in schools. Too often statements of values (”my children should not have sex outside of marriage”) come wrapped up in misstatements of fact (”sex education doesn’t work anyway”). Should we do everything possible to suppress teenage sexual behavior, or should we acknowledge that many teens are sexually active, and prepare them against the negative consequences? Emotional arguments can get in the way of an unbiased assessment of the effects of sex education.
Other countries have been much more successful than the US in addressing the problem of teen pregnancies. Age at first intercourse is similar in the US and five other countries: Canada, England, France, the Netherlands, and Sweden, yet all those countries have teen pregnancy rates that are at least less than half the US rate. Sex education in these other countries is based on the following components: a policy explicitly favoring sex education; openness about sex; consistent messages throughout society; and access to contraception.
Often sex education curricula begin in high school, after many students have already begun experimenting sexually. Studies have shown that sex education begun before youth are sexually active helps young people stay abstinent and use protection when they do become sexually active. The sooner sex education begins, the better, even as early as elementary school.

What kinds of programs work best?
Reducing the Risk, a program for high school students in urban and rural areas in California, used behavior theory-based activities to reduce unprotected intercourse, either by helping teens avoid sex or use protection. Ninth and 10th graders attended 15 sessions as part of their regular health education classes and participated in role playing and experimental activities to build skills and self-efficacy. As a result, a greater proportion of students who were abstinent before the program successfully remained abstinent, and unprotected intercourse was significantly reduced for those students who became sexually active.
Postponing Sexual Involvement, a program for African-American 8th graders in Atlanta, GA, used peers (11th and 12th graders) to help youth understand social and peer pressures to have sex, and to develop and apply resistance skills. A unit of the program also taught about human sexuality, decision-making, and contraceptives. This program successfully reduced the number of abstinent students who initiated intercourse after the program, and increased contraceptive use among sexually experienced females.
Healthy Oakland Teens (HOT) targets all 7th graders attending a junior high school in Oakland, CA. Health educators teach basic sex and drug education, and 9th grade peer educators lead interactive exercises on values, decision-making, communication, and condom-use skills. After one year, students in the program were much less likely to initiate sexual activities such as deep kissing, genital touching, and sexual intercourse.
AIDS Prevention for Adolescents in School, a program for 9th and 11th graders in schools in New York City, NY, focused on correcting facts about AIDS, teaching cognitive skills to appraise risks of transmission, increasing knowledge of AIDS-prevention resources, clarifying personal values, understanding external influences, and teaching skills to delay intercourse and/or consistently use condoms. All sexually experienced students reported increased condom use after the program.

A review of 23 studies found that effective sex education programs share the following characteristics:
Narrow focus on reducing sexual risk-taking behaviors that may lead to HIV/STD infection or unintended pregnancy. 
Social learning theories as a foundation for program development, focusing on recognizing social influences, changing individual values, changing group norms, and building social skills. 
Experimental activities designed to personalize basic, accurate information about the risks of unprotected intercourse and methods of avoiding unprotected intercourse. 
Activities that address social or media influences on sexual behaviors. 
Reinforcing clear and appropriate values to strengthen individual values and group norms against unprotected sex. 
Modeling and practice in communication, negotiation, and refusal skills.

What still needs to be done?
Although sex education programs in schools have been around for many years, most programs have not been nearly as effective as hoped. Schools across the country need to take a rigorous look at their programs, and begin to implement more innovative programs that have been proven effective. Educators, parents, and policy-makers should avoid emotional misconceptions about sex education; based on the rates of unwanted pregnancies and STDs including HIV among teenagers, we can no longer ignore the need for both education on how to postpone sexual involvement, and how to protect oneself when sexually active. A comprehensive risk prevention strategy uses multiple elements to protect as many of those at risk of pregnancy and STD/HIV infection as possible. Our children deserve the best education they can get.

ABORTION AS A PUBLIC HEALTH ISSUE

In the 1973 the United States Supreme Court struck down every federal, state, and local law regulating or restricting the practice of abortion. This action was based on the premise that the state’s no longer had any need to regulate abortion because the advances of modern medicine had now made abortion “relatively safe.” Therefore, the Justices concluded, it is unconstitutional to prevent physicians from providing abortions as a “health” service to women.
National abortion policy is built upon this judicial “fact” that abortion is a “safe” procedure. If this “fact” is found to be false, then national policy toward abortion must be re-evaluated. Indeed, if it is found that abortion may actually be dangerous to health of women, there is just cause for governments to regulate or prohibit abortion in order to protect their citizens. This is especially true since over 1.5 million women undergo abortions each year.
Since the Court’s ruling in 1973, there have been many studies into the aftereffects of abortion. Their combined results paint a haunting picture of physical and psychological damage among millions of women who have undergone abortions.
 

THE PHYSICAL COMPLICATIONS OF ABORTION
National statistics on abortion show that 10% of women undergoing induced abortion suffer from immediate complications, of which one-fifth (2%) were considered major.
Over one hundred potential complications have been associated with induced abortion. “Minor” complications include: minor infections, bleeding, fevers, chronic abdominal pain, gastro-intestinal disturbances, vomiting, and Rh sensitization. The nine most common “major” complications which are infection, excessive bleeding, embolism, ripping or perforation of the uterus, anesthesia complications, convulsions, hemorrhage, cervical injury, and endotoxic shock.
In a series of 1,182 abortions which occurred under closely regulated hospital conditions, 27 percent of the patients acquired post-abortion infection lasting 3 days or longer.
While the immediate complications of abortion are usually treatable, these complications frequently lead to long-term reproductive damage of much more serious nature.
For example, one possible outcome of abortion related infections is sterility. Researchers have reported that 3 to 5 percent of aborted women are left inadvertently sterile as a result of the operation’s latent morbidity. The risk of sterility is even greater for women who are infected with a venereal disease at the time of the abortion.
In addition to the risk of sterility, women who acquire post-abortal infections are five to eight times more likely to experience ectopic pregnancies. Between 1970-1983, the rate of ectopic pregnancies in USA has risen 4 fold. Twelve percent of all maternal deaths due to ectopic pregnancy. Other countries which have legalized abortion have seen the same dramatic increase in ectopic pregnancies.
Cervical damage is another leading cause of long term complications following abortion. Normally the cervix is rigid and tightly closed. In order to perform an abortion, the cervix must be stretched open with a great deal of force. During this forced dilation there is almost always causes microscopic tearing of the cervix muscles and occasionally severe ripping of the uterine wall, as well.
According to one hospital study, 12.5% of first trimester abortions required stitching for cervical lacerations. Such attention to detail is not normally provided at an outpatient abortion clinics. Another study found that lacerations occurred in 22 percent of aborted women.1 Women under 17 have been found to face twice the normal risk of suffering cervical damage due to the fact that their cervixes are still “green” and developing.
Whether microscopic or macroscopic in nature, the cervical damage which results during abortion frequently results in a permanent weakening of the cervix. This weakening may result in an “incompetent cervix” which, unable to carry the weight of a later “wanted” pregnancy, opens prematurely, resulting in miscarriage or premature birth. According to one study, symptoms related to cervical incompetence were found among 75% of women who undergo forced dilation for abortion.
Cervical damage from previously induced abortions increase the risks of miscarriage, premature birth, and complications of labor during later pregnancies by 300 - 500 percent. The reproductive risks of abortion are especially acute for women who abort their first pregnancies. A major study of first pregnancy abortions found that 48% of women experienced abortion-related complications in later pregnancies. Women in this group experienced 2.3 miscarriages for every one live birth. Yet another researcher found that among teenagers who aborted their first pregnancies, 66% subsequently experienced miscarriages or premature birth of their second, “wanted” pregnancies.
When the risks of increased pregnancy loss are projected on the population as a whole, it is estimated that aborted women lose 100,000 “wanted” pregnancies each year because of latent abortion morbidity. In addition, premature births, complications of labor, and abnormal development of the placenta, all of which can result from latent abortion morbidity, are leading causes of handicaps among newborns. Looking at premature deliveries alone, it is estimated that latent abortion morbidity results in 3000 cases of acquired cerebral palsy among newborns each year. Finally, since these pregnancy problems pose a threat to the health of the mothers too, women who have had abortions face a 58 percent greater risk of dying during a later pregnancy.

THE PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS OF ABORTION
Researchers investigating post-abortion reactions report only one positive emotion: relief. This emotion is understandable, especially in light of the fact that the majority of aborting women report feeling under intense pressure to “get it over with.”
Temporary feelings of relief are frequently followed by a period psychiatrists identify as emotional “paralysis,” or post-abortion “numbness.” Like shell-shocked soldiers, these aborted women are unable to express or even feel their own emotions. Their focus is primarily on having survived the ordeal, and they are at least temporarily out of touch with their feelings.
Studies within the first few weeks after the abortion have found that between 40 and 60 percent of women questioned report negative reactions. Within 8 weeks after their abortions, 55% expressed guilt, 44% complained of nervous disorders, 36% had experienced sleep disturbances, 31% had regrets about their decision, and 11% had been prescribed psychotropic medicine by their family doctor.
In one study of 500 aborted women, researchers found that 50 percent expressed negative feelings, and up to 10 percent were classified as having developed “serious psychiatric complications.”
Thirty to fifty percent of aborted women report experiencing sexual dysfunctions, of both short and long duration, beginning immediately after their abortions. These problems may include one or more of the following: loss of pleasure from intercourse, increased pain, an aversion to sex and/or males in general, or the development of a promiscuous life-style.
Up to 33 percent of aborted women develop an intense longing to become pregnant again in order to “make up” for the lost pregnancy, with 18 percent succeeding within one year of the abortion. Unfortunately, many women who succeed at obtaining their “wanted” replacement pregnancies discover that the same problems which pressured them into having their first abortion still exist, and so they end up feeling “forced” into yet another abortion.
In a study of teenage abortion patients, half suffered a worsening of psychosocial functioning within 7 months after the abortion. The immediate impact appeared to be greatest on the patients who were under 17 years of age and for those with previous psychosocial problems. Symptoms included: self-reproach, depression, social regression, withdrawal, obsession with need to become pregnant again, and hasty marriages.
The best available data indicates that on average there is a five to ten year period of denial during which a woman who was traumatized by her abortion will repress her feelings. During this time, the woman may go to great lengths to avoid people, situations, or events which she associates with her abortion and she may even become vocally defensive of abortion in order to convince others, and herself, that she made the right choice and is satisfied with the outcome. In reality, these women who are subsequently identified as having been severely traumatized, have failed to reach a true state of “closure” with regard to their experiences.
Repressed feelings of any sort can result in psychological and behavioral difficulties which exhibit themselves in other areas of one’s life. An increasing number of counselors are reporting that unacknowledged post-abortion distress is the causative factor in many of their female patients, even though their patients have come to them seeking therapy for seemingly unrelated problems.
Other women who would otherwise appear to have been satisfied with their abortion experience, are reported to enter into emotional crisis decades later with the onset of menopause or after their youngest child leaves home.
Numerous researchers have reported that postabortion crises are often precipitated by the anniversary date of the abortion or the unachieved “due date.” These emotional crises may appear to be inexplicable and short-lived, occurring for many years until a connection is finally established during counseling sessions.

A 5 year retrospective study in two Canadian provinces found that 25% of aborted women made visits to psychiatrists as compared to 3% of the control group.

Women who have undergone post-abortion counseling report over 100 major reactions to abortion. Among the most frequently reported are: depression, loss of self-esteem, self-destructive behavior, sleep disorders, memory loss, sexual dysfunction, chronic problems with relationships, dramatic personality changes, anxiety attacks, guilt and remorse, difficulty grieving, increased tendency toward violence, chronic crying, difficulty concentrating, flashbacks, loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities and people, and difficulty bonding with later children.
Among the most worrisome of these reactions is the increase of self-destructive behavior among aborted women. In a survey of over 100 women who had suffered from post-abortion trauma, fully 80 percent expressed feelings of “self-hatred.” In the same study, 49 percent reported drug abuse and 39 percent began to use or increased their use of alcohol. Approximately 14 percent described themselves as having become “addicted” or “alcoholic” after their abortions. In addition, 60 percent reported suicidal ideation, with 28 percent actually attempting suicide, of which half attempted suicide two or more times.

Birth control means things you can do to ensure that pregnancy only happens if and when you want it to. Birth control can mean abstinence. Abstinence is deciding not to do something, and abstaining from having sexual intercourse will ensure that pregnancy does not occur. Birth control can also mean using a method of contraception to ensure that pregnancy does not occur when you do have sexual intercourse.

What causes a girl to become pregnant?
Having sexual intercourse … when a boy’s hard penis goes inside a girl’s vagina - or even just touches the outside of her vagina … is what leads to pregnancy.
Usually, sometime between the ages of 11 and 15, a girl begins to have periods. This shows that the ovaries have begun to produce eggs. An egg is released every month. If it does not meet up with sperm which comes out of the boy’s penis during intercourse it dies. Then it leaves the body in the blood which comes out through the vagina during a girl’s period every month.
If a girl has sexual intercourse with a boy - and neither of them uses contraception, then the girl could become pregnant and a baby will begin to grow inside her womb.
A girl can become pregnant:
even if she has sex standing up
the first time she has sex
even if she has sex during her period
even if a boy pulls out (or withdraws) before he comes
if she forgets to take her pill.
If you have sexual intercourse pregnancy can be prevented by using a reliable method of contraception.

Are there many different methods of contraception?
How do you know which one to choose?
Where do you get contraceptives from?

There are a number of different methods of contraception all of which have their individual advantages and disadvantages. So as there is no clearly best method you have to decide which is most suitable for you. All forms of contraception work by preventing the fertilization of a woman’s egg by a man’s sperm. This can be achieved in various ways.
The first type are the barrier methods, which physically prevent sperm from swimming into the uterus and fertilizing the woman’s egg. The second type are hormonal methods which alter a woman’s hormonal cycle to prevent fertilization. There are the only types of contraception which are generally used by teenagers.
Other types of contraception which are generally not used by young people include the intrauterine device (IUD), which is generally not recommended for young women who have not had children; natural methods, which are often not effective enough; and sterilization which is a permanent surgical procedure.
All the hormonal methods of contraception are only available from a doctor. Some barrier methods such as the IUD are also only available from a doctor, but others such as the male condom and spermicides, are widely available in most countries. Another great advantage of barrier methods of contraception is that, if used properly every time, they also provide protection against sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) such as AIDS.

Barrier methods of contraception
The barrier methods of contraception generally used by teenagers are the male condom, the female condom and spermicides in the form of foam.

The male condom
The male condom is the only method of contraception boys can use. It’s really just a rubber tube. It’s closed at one end like the finger of a glove so that when a boy puts it over his penis it stops the sperm going inside a girl’s body. An advantage of using male condoms is that a boy can take an active part in using contraception. It’s not just left to the girl.
There is more information on other pages on this site about using condoms as well as the different types.

The female condom
The female condom is a fairly new barrier method. It is not as widely available as the male condom and it is more expensive. It is however very useful when the man either will not, or cannot use a male condom.
It’s a good idea to try to practise with condoms before having sex. You can get used to touching them, and it might help you feel more confident about using them when you do have sex.

Spermicides
Spermicides are chemical agents that keep sperm from travelling up into the cervix. Spermicide comes in different forms including the sponge, vaginal pessaries which melt in the vagina, and foam which is squirted into the vagina from an aerosol. It is usually spermicide in the form of foam which is used by young people.
Spermicides are not very effective against pregnancy when used on their own, but they can be used at the same time as the male condom which is then very effective. The male condom and spermicide when used together, is a good combination for providing effective protection against both pregnancy and STDs such as AIDS.

Hormonal methods of contraception
There are two main types of hormonal contraceptive which can be used by teens. If used properly both are extremely effective in providing protection against pregnancy. But they provide no protection at all against sexually transmitted diseases. For very good protection against both pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases such as AIDS, a hormonal method should be used at the same time as the male condom.

The contraceptive pill (sometimes known as the birth control pill)
What does ‘going on the pill’ mean?
People often talk (particularly in the UK) about being ‘on the pill’. This means they are using the oral contraceptive pill as a method of contraception. This has nothing to do with oral sex, and just means that the contraceptive is in pill form which the girl swallows. 

How does it work?
The pill contains chemicals called hormones. One type of pill called the combined pill has two hormones called Oestrogen and Progestogen. The combined pill stops the release of an egg every month - but doesn’t stop periods.
The other type of pill only has Progestogen in it. It works by altering the mucous lining of the vagina to make it thicker. The sperm cannot then get through, and as the sperm can’t meet the egg, the girl can’t get pregnant.

What do you do?
Usually the girl has to take one pill every day for about three weeks in every month. It is very important not to forget to take these pills. If this happens, protection against pregnancy is lost. The Progestogen-only pill also has to be taken at the same time every day.

How effective is the pill?
It is a very effective method of contraception. If the pill is taken exactly according to the instructions, the chance of pregnancy occurring is practically nil. A disadvantage of the pill is that it does not provide any protection against STDs. For very good protection against both pregnancy and STDs, the birth control pill should be used at the same time as the male condom.

Injectable Hormonal Contraceptive
How do you use it? How does it work?
The most popular form of this type of contraception, Depo-Provera, involves the girl having an injection once every twelve weeks. The injection is of the hormone Progestogen. The injection works in the same way in the body as the Progestogen only pill, but has the advantage that you do not have to remember to take a pill every day.
It does however have the same disadvantage as the hormonal pill, in that it provides no protection against STDs

Ed Note: This is a condition most often associated with women.

Why do some women have difficulty in achieving orgasm? There are a number of reasons why a woman may not be able to achieve orgasm, some physical others psychological.

Possible physical issues:
inadequate stimulation
medication treating another illness
injury or accident which affects genital receptiveness
conditions which interrupt nerve supply to the genitals

Possible psychological issues:
stress or anxiety
relationship problems
depression
cultural or religious guilt associated with sex
Know yourself

Being comfortable with your body is the first step to becoming orgasmic. Explore your beautiful body by yourself and be secure in all your minor flaws. We all have them, why should you be any different?

A wonderful first step is to take an evening to yourself and explore your body. Draw yourself a nice warm bath and then let any tension fade away. Next head into your bedroom and lock the door. Take a personal mirror and explore your genitals. Unlike men, women’s genitals are hidden from their eyes. So take a moment to see what your partner sees. Explore your beauty. Once you’re more comfortable an orgasm will be much easier to achieve.

If you’ve never masturbated before, then this is a good time to start. Allow yourself to totally relax and get wrapped up in the moment. Concentrate on the sensations that feel extremely pleasurable. Remember the techniques you used and teach them to your partner.

Make sure that you are in the mood
You should feel relaxed and comfortable so that you can fully appreciate sexual intimacy with yourself or your partner. In ideal circumstances you should be relaxed and stress free. For many women, the late evening is the worst time to engage in sexual activity. If you’re tired and wound up from a hectic day, wait for a relaxed Sunday afternoon when the kids are out of the house.
Additionally, if you’re angry at your partner, it may not be the best time to engage in sexual intimacy.

Communicate with your partner
Tell him/her what you find sexually stimulating. Many women can not achieve orgasm from intercourse. This is not a sexual dysfunction, it just means that your partner has to explore what you find most pleasurable. If you’re not sure, then you should do some exploring together. Make sure you give feedback and don’t be afraid to something “isn’t that great.”. If the stimulation provided by your partner isn’t strong enough, you may want to explore the use of a vibrator. Honest communication will help you achieve orgasm and make your partner a better lover.

Be adventurous
Oral sex or manual stimulation of the clitoris may be too infrequent for some women to achieve orgasm so an alternative method of stimulation is advised. Explore the entire genital region and find your most erogenous areas. Concentrate on what turns you on the most.

Be positive
Some women go through a stage of arousal where they are not becoming further excited. Many feel that this is where their arousal will end and that they will not be able to achieve an orgasm. Once a woman believes that she is not going to be able to have an orgasm, that is often exactly what happens.

Touch yourself
It is okay for you to touch yourself during sexual intimacy with a partner. Self stimulation is encouraged, and often accentuates the feeling of intercourse.